23 Years Late to the Concert

Picture this.

1984.

I was a sophomore in high school, and me, my best friend, and her older brother had tickets to see The Police in concert.

But I never got there. My Mom and Dad thought I was still "too young" to go to a concert by myself with friends. I moped around the house for days playing my "Synchronicity" album on my turntable.

Sadly, The Police would not be my first ever concert. They broke up during that tour. A year later, I went to my "first" concert. Live Aid in Philly. Bwahahaha. I have to laugh about that. My Mom thought I was too young to go to a two-hour concert across the bridge, but was okay with me going a few months later to an ALL DAY concert. Maybe she knew how historical of a concert that would be. lol.

So, after 23 years, I finally saw The Police at Boardwalk Hall in Atlantic City, NJ this past Saturday night.

I went with S. (who isn't a fan, but I love him for going anyway), my brother, and my SIL.

Let me digress, to give you some background. My parents are casino-addicted (in a good way, not the 1-800-GAMBLER way). Anyway, they are the people you see in Vegas and AC that never pay a red cent for a hotel room, meal, ticket, flight, etc, etc. High-rollers, if you will (although I still don't know how they got to that point and don't ask).

So, we all went down to AC on the casino's pocketbook. Butlered room, dinner at Gallagher's Steak House, and the concert.

So the butler brings us the tickets. And the FACE VALUE was $350 EACH. Do the math 4X$350= $1,400

Free to us.

WTF???? Are you kidding me?

So, fast forward to the concert... we get to our seats (2nd row on the side... a mere 50 feet from the stage) and we are cackling about who in their right mind would actually BUY $350 tickets. And the people in front of us turn around and wince. Yep, they actually paid that. And the people behind us. And then they all hated us and I felt like an idiot.

That aside, I really loved the concert. And I must make a few observations:

1. Sting looks younger than EVER. Dude is smokin' hot.
2. Since they have not toured in 23 years, they also must have never bothered to buy new instruments. Sting's bass looked like a 100 year old piece of driftwood you'd find on the beach. Not kidding.
3. The mean age of the audience was 45-50 years old. Also not kidding. WE were actually the YOUNGER people at the concert.
4. They can still rock out. Andy looked like he was about to have a stroke playing guitar, but Stewart was playing the drums like he was still 20.
5. Sting's son's band was the warm-up act. We did not know that until the morning after the concert after we mocked the kid all might for sounding too much like Sting. DUH.
6. Sting is hot. Did I already mention that?


So it was a very good weekend. Glad I finally made it to the concert. Better late than never, right?

It's a beautiful day

For my concerned readers... I am feeling much better today.

And, it's sunny and warm in the Northeast today, which puts me in a pretty darn good mood. Nothing like opening a window and breathing in the fresh air for a change.

Listening to the birds singing in the trees.

Spring is here.

Put down the windows, turn up the car stereo, and rock it out.

Be glad if yours isn't "highway to hell"

Do you have a life "theme" song?

I was watching TV last week, the new show Brothers and Sisters (which I can't decide if I like it or not... you know, the one with Callista Flockhart) which reminded me of Ally McBeal. Loved that show, btw.

Anyway, if you remember, in the show Ally had a "theme song", a song that she went to whenever life was down, disconnected, sad, etc.... I think I remember it being "My Everything" by Barry White. When life handed her a raw deal, she would think of the song and it would immediately perk her up. At the time, I remember thinking how stupid that was... sorta like the dancing baby and the odd occurrences in the unisex bathroom. Just a plot ploy to beg for laughs.

Anyhoo, this got me wondering, do I have a theme song for my life? The harder I thought about it, the more songs came to mind... and my little reflection ended up keeping me awake in bed one night thinking about it.

I had songs in my head, not so much an overall song, but ones that defined my life at the time.

Example, the high school years... probably would have to be "Purple Rain" or anything off of that album (yes, I said album). It was the epitome of teenage angst and an anthem for being different. Much like Nirvana was to teens of the 90's, I guess. I can remember blasting Purple Rain and feeling so much emotion. When I got banished to my room by my parents for issue du jour, it was my saving grace. Prince saved my teenage years from going too bad, I think. lol.

Flash forward to the late eighties, my college years. the song that came to mind first was not a song I especially liked, but rather one that I couldn't escape... "Welcome to the Jungle" (Guns + Roses). Memories of frat parties in the basement of the Phi Kap house, and the lovely combination of beer and ammonia sloshing between your toes (which is why most girls would stand on the benches that lined the basement to get our flip flops out of the ickyiness). Music of choice, anything that you could dance to and went well with beer. For that reason, I also must note that my all-time HATED song of college was "Paradise by the Dashboard Light", which was always played at the end of the night when you were too drunk to care. College of course was the years of the unknown, no one really knew what life held for them, but it was college life in the big city that ruled. I was young, we were young, and life was all that lay ahead. And it was exciting.

Then, the 90's, which were the years of my first job out of college, and marrying my honey. I was so afraid to cry walking down the aisle on my wedding day, so I sang a peppy Vince Gill song in my head ("One More Last Chance") to keep my mind off of the wedding march song. It worked. And if you don't know country music, that won't make much sense.

Of course, along the way, there are many songs that could have easily been applied before I had David, when S. and I worked to earn our first house. I was in my oldies phase for a while and loved listening to 70's music, a la Diana Ross "she works hard for the money".

And then there was 2003 when our little bundle of joy arrived and set our lives into a tailspin, being parents for the first time. S. and I would get teary eyed listening to Alan Jackson's "Remember When", which marked so many milestones we already achieved.

Remember when old ones died and new were born
And life was changed, disassembled, rearranged
We came together, fell apart
And broke each other's hearts
Remember when

Remember when the sound of little feet
was the music
We danced to week to week
Brought back the love, we found trust
Vowed we'd never give it up
Remember when

Remember when thirty seemed so old
Now lookn' back it's just a steppin' stone
To where we are,
Where we've been
Said we'd do it all again
Remember when


I know I am getting old when I cry at a favorite 80's song, something that is completely not a depressing song, but one that holds so many life memories. Such as the Pretenders, "Don't Get Me Wrong":

Dont get me wrong
If I come and go like fashion
I might be great tomorrow
But hopeless yesterday

Dont get me wrong
If I fall in the mode of passion
It might be unbelievable
But lets not say so long
It might just be fantastic
Dont get me wrong

Lately, I've grown philosophical about aging. The crazy thing about getting older is the years tick by but the longer and faster they move along, you still feel like a kid. I may be pushing 40, but I still feel the little girl alive and well.

When we are young, we are in such a hurry to move forward, and after a certain point, you want to freeze in time, just for a little while. Reflection becomes an asset, and seeing the past in 20/20 is inescapable...

15 there's still time for you
Time to buy, Time to lose yourself
Within a morning star
15 I'm all right with you
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live
Half time goes by
Suddenly you’re wise
Another blink of an eye
67 is gone
The sun is getting high
We're moving on...


So, unlike Ally, I don't think I can come up with a life theme song. There are just too many to choose from and I am not prepared to lock in on one. Plus, I am finicky, and if I choose one, I'll undoubtedly want to change it later. So, what's the point?

I'll take them all.

Don't call him Sir Bono

Bono was bestowed a knighthood by Queen Elizabeth II (although he can't use the title "Sir" since he's not a Brit). [Bono is one of the few men that just makes me swoon!]

I love this guy to death, does he not have a bad bone in his body or a skeleton somewhere in the closet?? If only all celebs used their starpower as handily as Bono....

See article here>>>
http://www.eonline.com/news/article/index.jsp?uuid=ca40b44e-fc07-4cc6-8304-132989a06cc9

Photo from U2.com

Manic Monday

Quiz time. Who sang the aforementioned song? If you don't know then you are either way older than me or younger, in which case you suck.

hehe, just kidding.

ok, not really.

I am recovering from a looooong weekend, and really don't feel like crawling out from under the rock I am presently comfortable under.

Monday brings the reality of a few thoughts... 1) I am behind on Christmas shopping 2) I feel fat from eating WAAAY too much over the weekend 3) Work does not stop just because I want it to.

I am also annoyed because I thought of the perfect gift for my "incredibly difficult to buy for" father, only to realize that the item I was planning to get at Target was on sale only for Friday and Saturday. I missed the boat. And, on this cyber-Monday (some said it's the busiest online shopping day) I am searching for digital photo frames, and not coming up with anything under $100 (the Target version was $69.98)....

Can I please go back to bed?

And for those of you who didn't get the question, the answer is The Bangles.

When decades collide, Duran Duran meets JT?

Now I know I am getting way old.

I was catching up on news this morning with my giant cup of coffee, and I saw this....

Headline: Timberlake Works on Duran-Duran Album

http://www.comcast.net/news/entertainment/index.jsp?cat=ENTERTAINMENT&fn=/2006/11/12/519217.html

Duran Duran (and U2, Depeche Mode, INXS) are my absolute favorite bands growing up. I once slept out in the rain for front row Duran Duran tickets when I was 19 years old. I did that at least 10 times in my teenage/college days. If you were living in the Philadelphia area in the early 80's you would also remember that one of the first appearances they made in the US was on the local TV show, "Dancin On Air".

Seeing this headline triggered some fast math, and I just realized I have been following this band for 26 years. oh my!

I must admit, I also own the newest Justin Timberlake CD. I don't LOVE him, but I like his music (catchy, easy to dance to.... great to make swift work of housecleaning whilst listening to my iPod).

I know I am risking sounding like a TOTAL geek, but this matching might be really cool.

OK- I'm going to shink back in my corner now, laugh at me if you must!

Circle of friends

"Glory days, well they'll pass you by
Glory days, in the wink of a young girl's eye
Glory days, glory days" ~ Bruce Springsteen

Often I post things in this blog which bring back some serious memories good and bad. I don't like to spill my guts all over this blog, but I remember that one of the reasons I initially wanted to do this blog was to document memories, and have a place of my own to go to when I am stressed out, happy, or just contemplating something silly like a new handbag purchase.

I have to confess, I have a major source of guilt? sadness? that stalks me wherever I go.

I woke up last night with a dream I remember vividly. It was a dream about friends. Specifically my former 3 best friends in the world.

Nancy, Lisa, and Camille.

We met at different times in our childhood, but by the 9th grade we were stuck together like glue. Lisa and Camille and I were friends as far back as 4th/5th grade. Nancy came to complete our foursome in high school (she was a good catholic girl that spent grades K-8 in the local catholic school).

From our friendship, we created a giant circle of friends around us. We became a group of 10 or more (girls and boys) and our circle of friends carried forward for many years... beyond high school... beyond college. The four of us, plus our merry band of friends... Laura, Amy, Jennifer, Kenny, Bobby, Brian, Keith, Tony, Darance, Dennis, Chuck, Rob. We were a group of diversity. Jocks and geeks. Bookworms and popular kids. Black and white. It was amazing how the differences drew us closer. We were like a band without instruments (except for our loud voices, which got us in trouble from time to time). In High School, we had parties, went to the movies, went to theme parks, went to the shore. Most of us were the Class of 1986. We were kids of the 80's. We listened to Bruce Springsteen, The Cars, Duran Duran, Journey, The Cure. It was the time of high hair, mullets, Jordache jeans, and day-glo sweatshirts (with the collar cut out of course, a-la Flashdance).

When college came, we all went our separate ways. Lisa went to Rowan, Camille to Rutgers, Nancy to U of Maryland,... I went to LaSalle. Our other friends went away too, some to the greatest colleges/universities in the country. Some stayed home. It didn't matter where we went, we always came home for the holidays and part of the summer. The "girls" had beach week in the summer. The guys always came down for a day to make sure we weren't getting into too much trouble (and to make their own trouble). In the winter we always had a Christmas party at Camille's house. Her mom would make the best spinach dip, and we would gather in the rec room to talk about all the exciting things we did during the school year. Someone always threw the New Years Eve party, and every year we'd open a (few) bottles of champagne and drink/toast the new year.

The girls, usually me, Lisa, Camille, Nancy, and Laura., had a tradition that we started... I don't know, maybe when we all got our drivers licenses... where we would go shopping every year on Black Friday. We never, never, missed that. We would drive to mall, blasting the radio and laughing and gossiping about everything.

When we all graduated from college, some of us went into the work world, some went on to pursue MBA or doctoral degrees. Camille was in publishing, Nancy was in social work, Lisa and I still searching for what we loved. I ended up in technology, and Lisa did a myriad of jobs along the way. Nancy moved to New Orleans, and Camille to North Jersey. Which really just gave the rest of us an excuse to travel to see each other and find new mexican restaurants and cute boys.

Eventually, we started to find significant others and marry. Lisa was first (age 27) and then me, in the same year. At first, it didn't really affect our friendship, but as you might imagine... having a husband and other responsibility just added more to juggle. Lisa had a baby shortly thereafter.
I remember going to her son's christening party, and just thinking how different we all were. Something felt odd.

As we approached our 30's, there were fewer and fewer get-togethers, and one year (the year I turned 31) we didn't get together at all for our Thanksgiving shopping tradition. Soon after, the phone calls dwindled, the birthday cards went unanswered.

One day I woke up and realized that I lost my best friends. There was no fight, no one incident that changed things, we just drifted away.

Years later, you would think that I would just look back at the fond memories. And I do, but to be honest, I feel absolutely awful that this happened. I feel like it's my fault... that I should have been the glue to bring everyone together. I think about them often. I wonder what they are doing.

Lisa and I saw each other maybe 2 years ago. She had another baby, a little girl... the same month I had David. We met for lunch and talked about how nice it would be if we could find the other girls and get together. We never did.

I run into one of the guys now and then. I dated one of them back when I got out of college. Briefly, I was reunited with my guy friends, but they eventually disappeared too. It was hard to drift away from the outer circle of friends, but I knew it would happen eventually... I just never thought that the four of us would give up so easy. I was fully prepared to have a baby who would have an Aunt Nancy, Aunt Lisa, Aunt Camille to dote on him/her for life. No such luck.

Why would we invest so much time only to lose the ones we love?
What could we have done differently?
Do they think about me?
Are they married, do they have kids?
Are they nearby or far away?

Questions I might never know the answer to. Which seems odd when you have been connected at the hip for almost 20 years. All I know is I feel like I lost my sisters. Every year, around Thanksgiving/Christmas I am reminded of them. Like ghosts. They invade my dreams every once in awhile, and in those dreams I re-live what was and what could have been.

I carry this guilt with me wherever I go. Like a bad habit. I do think that it has impacted my relationships with other people. Often I find myself specifically not getting too invested in friends for this reason. It makes me sad.

As we near the Thanksgiving Holiday, I remember my old friends. Every last one, but especially my "sisters".

So, if you are out there Lisa, Camille, Nancy (and the all the rest of you).... I miss you.