Last August, I started this blog with no purpose other than to vent to myself. I didn't care if anyone read it. It was just a place for me to go and unwind.
I was just another working Mom with an expensive hobby (handbags, remember? - I seemed to have strayed from that lately...lol).
I thought I had nothing to share with the blogosphere. Nothing unique about me. Just another blogger to enter the fray.
In August of 2006, I was just getting back into TTC after my first loss. I was cautious, but hopeful. I was naive. Little did I know the path I was about to walk on. The kind of path that takes you along to experience the ultimate joys and the pits of despair (sometimes even in the same day).
At some point in the last year, my blog went from happy and lighthearted to cold and broken. And back to lighthearted, and then broken. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.
Also over the last year, people started to read my blog. A few, and then a handful, and then many. I thought, "why do people come here? are they just being nice, or really like my blog?"
And all of a sudden it hit me that anyone could find my blog and I would be exposed. Will they think I am a selfish person? shallow? After all, this started out as a venture to keep ME sane, not worrying about who I might offend in a post, what things I should or should not talk about, or pictures I should or shouldn't post.
And then, a curious thing happened.
I started meeting women like me. Working Moms. Work at Home Moms. Women experiencing Secondary Infertility. Women experiencing Primary Infertility. Humanity. People I just like because they seem like friends I would have outside the Internet.
People like you, my readers. Many of you have blogs I frequent each day. My Google Reader is filled with almost 150 blogs I like to read. Stories I follow. Life moments. Hints from the trenches. Crazy people who make me laugh when I need it most. Plain ole' fun.
The sanity I am looking for has now developed in two unexpected ways:
Me putting my thoughts to the keyboard, and you responding.
And to my surprise, I ended up with a circle of blogging friends that I look forward to interacting with each day. So whether you are a regular reader, an IRL friend, an acquaintance or a mere passerby I thank you for stopping here in my world if even for a moment. Your comments make me realize I am truly connecting in a way I never imagined.
So as I meet the first anniversary of BagMomma I find I'm in the middle of a blogging split personality it seems. Is this still the blog I started? Have I alienated some of my readers now that much of my content is heavily weighted in IF? Should I start another blog just talking about my infertility?
And, the answer that came to mind in short order is.... no.
Here I am.
BagMomma, Shelli, IF Flunkie, whatever.... this blog is me. Right now, expanding into another blog would be like diluting myself. And staying true to my original intentions, you will get the best and worst of BagMomma.
So expect a myriad of topics in the next year. I'll be blogging about work, balancing life with a child, family, and my upcoming IF treatments. I may even get back to talking fashion and bags. And I promise never to lose my sense of humor. Because you already expect that from me.
Here's to another year... of sharing and hope.