Pages

Friday, August 22, 2008

Notes from Bed

That title could have a double-meaning, couldn't it?

So it's not even been 24 hours on bed rest yet for this first IVF cycle, and I am already reaching my full of TV, magazines, and playing with the cats. Thank the lord for the Internet. I've had more time to read and comment than I've had in the last month.

Kim asked if I have named the three embryos currently setting up vacancy in my womb. Now, you all know that I suffer from "superstitionosis" (yeah, I made up that word). Meaning, I feel like I am playing chicken with the devil giving these embryos an identity early on. I've not done it in the past with my miscarriages, but then I remembered we used to call David "Peanut" early on, so I thought why not buck tradition and walk under that ladder today? lol.

Then I saw a comment from Janis yesterday that suggested Gucci, Fendi, and Prada. Kudos Janis. I like your thinking. Sorta goes with the theme of my blog? But ok, it is a little pretentious...

Another friend suggested the Three Amigos, which I liked but lacked a distinction between any individual embryos.

Thinking in bed last evening, my mind started to wander to the common themes though my secondary infertility journey.

Hope.

Hope is a recurring message on this blog. I talk about it a lot, and even though Hope and I have had a precarious relationship over the years, I still find myself clinging to it. Rebeccah commented a few days ago: "when you catch sight of hope peeking around the door, grab her and yank her in for a cup of tea! Read her stories, rub her feet, convince her to stay. She's darn good company." Rebeccah, you hit the nail on the head.

Faith.

Faith is the driver that keeps me on the path. The path sure has been winding, but it's a feeling at the core of my soul that this journey is far from over.

Charity.

I would most certainly not be here in this state of mind today if not for the kindness of others. My blogging friends have pulled me back from that ledge numerous times now. I am thankful to have people in my life real or virtual that have proven to me that I don't exist in a vacuum. I thrive with others.

So, Hope, Faith, and Charity it is. My three little embryos.